Greetings Internets,This is a story all about how we made Apple and everything they own, our bitch for life.Hello, good day, and how are you? Splendid! We're LulzSec, a small team of lulzy individuals who feel the drabness of the cyber community is a burden on what matters: fun. Considering fun is now restricted to Friday, where we look forward to the weekend, weekend, we have now taken it upon ourselves to spread fun, fun, fun, throughout the entire calender year.As you should know, The Lulz Boat stores vast amounts of booty; much of this booty we don't release as it's simply too shiny and/or delicious. As of late, certain inferior sailing boats have discovered flaws in the iCloud (the iCloudthegame.com), thinking themselves exciting and new.Too late. The Lulz Boat controls this ocean, chumps.Some weeks ago, we smashed into the iCloud with our heavy artillery Lulz Cannons and decided to switch to ninja mode. From our LFI entry point, we acquired command execution via local file inclusion of enemy fleet Apache vessel. We then found that the HTTPD had SSH auth keys, which let our ship SSH into other servers. See where this is going?We then switched to root ammunition rounds.And we rooted... and rooted... and rooted...After mapping their internal network and thoroughly pillaging all of their servers, we grabbed all their source code and database passwords, which we proceeded to shift silently back to our storage deck."It seems the glorious leader of LulzSec got arrested. Whois driving the boat?"
@BarackObama has just passed. The President is dead. A sad 4th of July, indeed. President Barack Obama is dead@BarackObama has just passed. Nearly 45 minutes ago, he was shot twice in the lower pelvic area and in the neck; shooter unknown. Bled out@BarackObama shot twice at a Ross' restaurant in Iowa while campaigning. RIP Obama, best regards to the Obama family.#ObamaDead, it's a sad 4th of July. RT to support the late president's family, and RIP. The shooter will be foundBREAKING NEWS: President @BarackObama assassinated, 2 gunshot wounds have proved too much. It's a sad 4th for #america. #obamadead RIPWe wish @joebiden the best of luck as our new President of the United States. In such a time of madness, there's light at the end of tunnel
"I would consider us to be close in relation [to Anonymous], 2 of the members of our group were members of Anonymous," said a representative of The Script Kiddies, who, for reasons that should be quite clear, asked to remain, yes, anonymous. "I was a member of Anonymous. We hope to be working with them soon.""We are looking to find information about corporations to assist with antisec. Fox News was selected because we figured their security would be just as much of a joke as their reporting. It will be a never ending battle.""The names change from time to time like LulzSec and Anonymous or Script Kiddies. But [there] will always be a group of people that need to stand up for everyone else and attempt to keep the government in balance with it’s people. Without groups like Anonymous, what is there to prevent corruption?"
Today we are celebrating our country, honoring our troops, and enjoying a little BBQ. From all of us at #Obama2012, have a wonderful Fourth.