Print 40 comment(s) - last by quiksilvr.. on May 21 at 11:15 AM

MacBook gets an upgrade, sticks to $999 price tag

The final piece to Apple's notebook puzzle is now in place. The company today officially unveiled a slightly revamped entry-level MacBook (the update was actually leaked over the weekend).

The latest polycarbonate white MacBook now features a 2.4GHz Core 2 Duo processor, NVIDIA GeForce 320M integrated graphics solution, and a new 10-hour battery. The previous model came with a 2.26GHz Core 2 Duo processor, NVIDIA GeForce 9400M integrated graphics, an a 7-hour battery.

Other features like 2GB of DDR3 memory, 250GB hard drive, and 8x dual-layer SuperDrive remain unchanged.

This latest innards upgrade brings the MacBook in line with the entry-level 13" MacBook Pro. It still, however, lacks the Pro model's aluminum shell, backlit keyboard, Secure Digital slot, and Firewire 800 port.

Despite the slight feature bump, the latest MacBook is still priced at $999.

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Higher temperature?
By stimudent on 5/18/2010 8:08:17 AM , Rating: 1
The previous models made it up to 100C.
Lets see if this upgrade can make it up to 120C - 150C.

RE: Higher temperature?
By MrBlastman on 5/18/2010 8:10:06 AM , Rating: 3
They make them white... for white hot!

RE: Higher temperature?
By chagrinnin on 5/18/2010 9:05:08 AM , Rating: 3
I heard if you looked at pr0n the screen would turn yellow. Have they come up with a workaround for that yet?

RE: Higher temperature?
By MrBlastman on 5/18/2010 9:16:44 AM , Rating: 3
But you see, this all alludes to the greater picture of things. Have you ever sat under a tree for a while, watching the puffs of clouds blow by in the deep blue sky on a warm, sunny day, pondering the mysteries of Apple?

If you had, you'd realize something astounding. Why, oh why do the macbooks get so hot? Simple, well, at least if you read Jobs.

They get hot to burn your nuts off. If they're roasted and crisped to a nice golden-red hue, your desire of porn will drop proportionately.

You see, it is all in his master plan. You buy his products, they burn your nuts off, he doesn't have to look like the bad guy banning porn for long. Eventually, nobody will want to buy it period because it just hurts to darned much to even think of manhandling the warrior below.

RE: Higher temperature?
By chagrinnin on 5/18/2010 9:35:54 AM , Rating: 2
Soooo,....there's no workaround?

RE: Higher temperature?
By MrBlastman on 5/18/2010 10:05:49 AM , Rating: 4
There is one, though I regret to mention it here. There is a little known tidbit floating around in the great seas of the internet that goes like this:

Jobs likes himself... a lot. We know this because he wears turtlenecks. Turtlewhats? Yes, turtlenecks.

Wait, why would wearing turtlenecks show that he likes himself or anything else besides being slightly feminine (he DOES cross his legs in a nut-crushing manner when he sits down)? Simple.

The turtlenecks are to keep the blood in his head. You see, he's so full of himself he needs to boost his ego by not letting his i-clorians escape from his brain. They are his, mind you, and nobody elses. Yes, his, and he doesn't want to share. The turtlenecks keep the blood in his head so he can stay full of himself all day long. How dare you think that he would piss i-clorians out into the public water supply after they were processed by his kidneys.

He'll have none of that!

So, what's the solution, you might ask yourself? You have to cater to Jobs' ego.

Yes, ego, his inflated turtle-necked ego. This is why the screen turns yellow. He's pissing on you, yes, pissing all over your computer screen and coating your living-room walls with his golden, amber hue. That camera is there by design. It is there so he can photograph you after being pissed, and the last laugh is his...

Almost. So your screen has turned yellow, your pissed because you've been pissed and Jobs, full of himself in his turtleneck is laughing and you, you want to fix it?

If only the answer were not as complicated as the twisted tale above. It isn't. You simply change your wallpaper on your macbook to a picture of Jobs. Yes, a picture of Jobs. You plaster on your background and make sure you close all windows. No! Not minimize! Close them all! You have to close them, you see, as Jobs wants himself to be the object of your attention. No distractions! Remember, his turtleneck will not fail him and his psychic powers bestowed upon him by his i-clorians being bottled up inside are far-reaching.

Okay, so you have Jobs on your desktop. Great! Now, I hope you have a bottle of lube lying around. Make sure though, that the lube doesn't start with the letter "i" in the name. Perplexed? Don't be. Remember, you are doing this for him, not you, so how dare you be thinking of yourself right now. So, grab the lube, drop trow and winkle your wonker to his glorious image.

I guarantee you, after doing this, your screen will stop being yellow, the image of Jobs will smile somehow (don't wonder why, it just does because Jobs says it will), your macbook will be white again and all will be good once more on your Mac.

You wanted to know... Don't blame me for trying to help.

RE: Higher temperature?
By chagrinnin on 5/18/2010 10:36:30 AM , Rating: 2
Aaaargh, I'm one out of three people. :(

RE: Higher temperature?
By rcc on 5/18/2010 3:18:30 PM , Rating: 2
lol, you have some deep seated issues. But at least they come out as mildy amusing. : )

RE: Higher temperature?
By quiksilvr on 5/18/2010 8:52:09 AM , Rating: 2
Okay seriously. Why the hell don't they put some vents on these things? They have all that space on the back. Just put some vents there!

RE: Higher temperature?
By MrBlastman on 5/18/2010 8:56:18 AM , Rating: 2
Because vents aren't stylish! Don't you forget, Apple is about style maaaaaaan, it's gotta look cooooooool dude, while being hot! ( ;) )

RE: Higher temperature?
By Highter on 5/18/2010 9:38:38 AM , Rating: 2
Jobs hates coolers. I mean really hates them. He has been trying (unsuccessfully) to force his engineers to stop using them since the company was created. I remember reading that on one of the older apple models (from before Jobs was fired) he ordered the coolers to be removed only to later find out that the engineers had disobeyed him to prevent the machine from melting down.

RE: Higher temperature?
By sebmel on 5/18/2010 8:12:01 PM , Rating: 2
Do you guys ever bother with irritating details like the facts?

They do have vents in... on the back... just where you suggested.
Can't see them? Well there's a riddle for you... work it out instead of ranting.

RE: Higher temperature?
By quiksilvr on 5/21/2010 11:15:50 AM , Rating: 2
Oh, you mean that opening thats virtually blocked by the hinge? Great location...

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